Today is my last ever day of undergraduate classes. I have a quiz on shit that I don’t know. I handed in the worst term paper of my life yesterday and accidentally flashed the professor in the process. I don’t know what to say about that except that I guess I hope she liked the view.

It’s sinking in that the end is here. There are 11 days until commencement. Then I’m done. Then I have to submit my final transcript and get ready to register for grad school classes.

I have a project due Tuesday. For the class that’s been my constant struggle this semester. Then it’s time to write and heal. I don’t know how to do that. I want to hate (censored), but I can’t, and I think the more I try, the more I can only love (censored) and hope. That really sucks.

So, what if the one and the one that got away are one and the same?

Maybe one day I’ll figure that out in my writing. Until then, I’m trying to watch the bridges burn, and I’m trying to be fine with it. Fresh starts are only ever good. And it’s been a long time coming. But still, even Nell got to salvage something from her old life in Into The Forest. Shouldn’t I be allowed to hold onto something? Some small fragment to make the transition easier? No? Okay, well, I’ll let you know how that goes, then.